Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Takin the Stage

I made it through amateur night and I have to tell you, that was definitely the coolest thing I've ever done. Thanks to everyone who came we had a strong turnout from both home and St. A's. Respect it. The server is currently not cooperating with me so I cannot yet upload the audio onto the blog, but if any of you lost souls would like the clip just shoot me an IM (officerdiorio) and I will gladly send it along. I am now on my own ipod which is cool. I feel like my boy Dan Blanchard, who has a band called Offshore that you will all be hearing from very very soon. They rock hard. Anyways, the quality of the file isnt top notch because it was recorded from the crowd so you hear a them louder than me, but if you crank it you can at least hear the performance if you couldn't make it or were to cheap to go...... like Matt Neumann. Mr Neumann wears a headset and a yellow tie to work every day and they dont pay him enough to gain admission into the comedy connection.

Now about the actual performance. I didnt even go to work the day of because I would have been freaking out and shitting myself all day. I decided to sleep in and do that from home. Once I finally decided on what I was going to say, it was just a matter of time before I went downtown and got onstage. Since I have a debilitating fear of speaking in front of people I decided that there was only one way I was going to make it onstage: Booze. I only had 3 beers before I left but I got to Fanueil Hall at 7 so there was plenty of time for my Guardian Angel....gin. I found what has to be the shittiest bar downtown and went in and started drinking. I wasnt even done with my first drink when two of my old chums from St. A's randomly walked in. It was at that point when I realized I couldnt fuck up too bad because there were a lot of people I know coming.

Fast forward to 7:30. I walk upstairs to the club and see some friends outside and I check in with the doorman. I set out on a mission to hammer as many drinks as the waitress can bring before I go onstage. I am going on 6th because I am assuming they dont want half of the tritown to leave early. You have to tell them who you are seeing for amateur night. Anyway, the show begins and I am still nervous. Still drinking, but still very very nervous. Strangely my hands were not shaking. DiOrio's hands shake when they eat soup for fuck's sake but thankfully mine were not even tho I was within an hour of trying to make a bunch of people laugh. I didnt pay too much attention to the acts before me. I wrote on my wrist some bullet points in case I froze up there. Still boozin but not feeling as wacked as I should have, my time was up. The host called me up and it was showtime.

Thankfully I had a lot of support there which made the whole thing a lot easier. You can get the audio from me if you wanna hear how it went and/or talk to someone who was there. In my personal opinion though, it went pretty well for my first time. I'd say it beat when I lost my virginity in terms of my performance. I did forget a couple lines that I really thought would have went well but what the fuck are you going to do. One thing I did learn was that going on stage is fucking addicting. I think I may try to do this more often.....

In other news read my bro's site,
and if you dont get the Blazing Saddles reference in the title, die a slow and painful death. His blog is more current events related so freshen up your world perspective and get ur news from a DiOrio.


Anonymous Neumann said...

I'm not going to defend myself. I'm simply going to say i am a bad friend, i don't deserve matt diorio as a friend. I do not wear yellow ties, and laziness got the better of me. It was a lapse in judgement and for that I apologize, of all the people i could of stiffed on their big night, its a comedian, haha, fuckin diorio.

7:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

old c.mac here.

Sorry i missed your big debut old buddy. I had to beat the number one team in my conference. I fouled out in the first two seconds, so i might have made it, but then i got shot in the face by a canon and my ears were ringing awful.... anyways, i wont miss another thing of yours ever. I promise.

8:26 PM  
Anonymous keely said...

i find this site exciting.. i think you should leave the name "name this blog"
and people can call it whatevs they want.. i get excited while i'm compulsivly checking away messages on my aim and see it's been updated.. =P

11:20 PM  

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